A friend of mine recently realized that her desire to get married had become a worry for her. It felt like a weight hanging around her neck, and she knew she needed to treat it the same way she would treat any other weight in her life—she needed to give it to God.

“God did not design me to worry about anything,” she said. “I’ve been carrying this weight for years—without realizing it was a worry, like any other worry. This is a ‘burden’ I can just hand to God.”

My friend is approaching forty, and for the first time in years, she knows she doesn’t need to worry about being single. She can entrust her marriage hopes and her future husband to God without trying to bear the weight of them herself.

Valentine’s Day is this week—and it’s a time when many single people are quite aware of their singleness. As it was for my friend, singleness can feel like a weight around your neck, but that isn’t what God wants for you.

If you find yourself feeling lonely this Valentine’s Day, here are a few important things you should know about Jesus and the plans He has for you. Think on these things until they sink down into your heart and become part of your faith in God.

1. Jesus Is the Greatest Love of Your Life

Whenever we say, “I am alone,” we aren’t speaking the truth. We are never alone because Jesus is right here with us. He is our first and greatest love; this remains true even after we get married—He will always come first.

The next time loneliness threatens to overwhelm your soul, go spend time with Jesus. Write out the truth of who He is in your life and repeat those points whenever you start to feel melancholy or depressed.

2. Being Single Is Just a Phase

Try to enjoy this time because it won’t last forever. One day when you’re married, you will likely look back at this time of singleness and wish you had enjoyed it more and worried about it less. 

Enjoy the relationships God has put in your life right now. This week do a little experiment—ask God what would make you happy and then put together a plan with your friends. Go on an adventure with them, and take this opportunity to do the fun thing He’s put on your heart.

3. Don’t Listen to Lies 

Don’t allow any lies to fill your mind and heart about “why” you’re single. When those lies start to whisper to you, choose to speak the truth instead: “I believe God has great plans for my love life. He has someone special for me as I become the one. No one else can be me or do what I can do. I am distinct and exceptional; I am uniquely made, and I trust in my heavenly Father.”

The enemy will try to convince you that lies are truth. But God is bigger than any lie you might be fighting right now. Instead of listening to the lie about who you are or why you’re single, choose this day to believe the truth of God. 

4. God Has Your Hopes and Dreams in Mind

Trust that God will fulfill the desires of your heart according to His will. He wants you to find an amazing companion who will help you grow closer to Jesus. With this person, you will be able to experience what healthy intimacy looks like.

Your heavenly Father wants you to be delighted in, honored, and supported in a way that brings Him glory, and for you to love someone else this way as well. So He will provide.

Thank Him for what He is already doing, and understand in your heart that He is right here with you, ready to let you know how amazingly beautiful you are to Him. Someone just as amazing will be here with you in His perfect timing. 

For more information on sex, marriage, and finding the person who is right for you, get a copy of Becoming the One by Salomé Roat. Click here to learn more.  

You can also order the book in Spanish. Click here.