Why Is It So Important to Guard Your Thoughts When You’re Single?
Photo by Anastasia Shuraeva
One of the most important things you can do as a single person is practice taking your thoughts captive. Why is this necessary? Because, if allowed, the enemy will try to deceive you about this season in your life.
“God has a spouse for everyone else. But not for you.”
“It’s your fault you’re single. You’re not doing it right.”
“You’re just a mess.”
“You are too broken.”
“You didn’t hear God correctly. You messed up. He doesn’t really have good plans for you.”
The enemy wants to take your hope, but you don’t need to allow any dark thought to run around freely in your mind. If you’re faithful to “sort” your thoughts and take captive the ones that do not contain God’s brilliant light, this greatly reduces the enemy’s ability to tempt and harass you.
Here are three areas where you can take your thoughts captive while you’re single.
1. Take captive any thoughts that don’t line up with God’s incredible love for you.
How precious is your unfailing love, O God!
All humanity finds shelter
in the shadow of your wings. (Ps. 36:7 NLT)
“All humanity,” this verse says. That’s you. It is you when you feel like you’re doing well being single, and it is you when you feel miserable and lonely and like life isn’t fair. You are sheltered in the wings of God the entire time.
Take your thoughts captive in the area of God’s affection for you. Don’t allow the enemy to point to your singleness as “proof” that God has somehow forgotten you. He has certainly not forgotten you—His love would never allow for this. Give yourself some time; quiet your heart, and let the Holy Spirit show you how much you’re loved.
2. Purposefully take your thoughts captive in the morning, when you first wake up.
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I entrust my life. (Ps. 143:8 NIV)
It is a good and delightful thing to give thanks to the Lord,
To sing praises to Your name, O Most High,
To declare Your lovingkindness in the morning
And Your faithfulness by night. (Ps. 92:1–2 AMP)
Some of us have a tendency to focus on negative things in the morning. Maybe we start to feel uncertain about God’s plans for us: “Are they truly good?” Or “Am I going to be alone forever?” Some of us can struggle with depression or hopelessness first thing in the morning: “I’m a bad person, and I don’t think God wants me to be in a relationship with anybody.”
One way we take our thoughts captive is by training them to focus on God’s love, specifically in the morning. We have the ability—and authority, because of Jesus—to say “no” to any thought that rejects His love. As the Bible says, it is good to focus on the love of the Lord in the morning.
[To learn more about God’s deep, endless, abiding affection for you, check out Salomé Roat’s book, Becoming the One.]
3. Take your thoughts captive by reminding yourself of who God is and what He has already done for you.
Remember the former things of old;
for I am God, and there is no other;
I am God, and there is none like me. (Isa. 46:9 ESV)
Do not be afraid of them; remember well what the Lord your God did to Pharaoh and to all Egypt. (Deut. 7:18 NIV)
One key way to take your thoughts captive is to remember, on purpose, what the Lord has already done.
How have you seen His provision? What has He told you about your future spouse or how He’s taking care of you? What has He already done for you? Think about a time when God moved on your behalf in some way—it could be something very, very small—and write it down. For the next seven days, keep it close to you while you’re sleeping, and look at it first thing in the morning when you wake up. “This is what God is like in my life.”
This Next Week…
This is how you get to think as a child of God:
Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart]. (Phil. 4:8 AMP)
If you start to feel depressed, tired, or “very single” this week, practice taking your thoughts captive. Remember how much the Lord loves you, and purposefully remind yourself of what He has promised you. If you have questions, ask Him. Spend time with Him, set your questions before Him, and write down what you feel He says. Don’t be afraid to keep trusting Him, because He will do exactly what He promised.
Your heavenly Father loves you more than you realize! Check out these other devotions:
For more information on sex, marriage, and finding the person who is right for you, get a copy of Becoming the One by Salomé Roat. Click here to learn more. The book is also available in Spanish.