How Will I Know?

Many young ladies I talk to, have the same questions I did as a young lady. How do I know who I should date? How do I know that the man I’m dating is the right one for me? Ultimately, how do I know if it is God’s will for me to marry this man? Personally, I knew that God wanted the best for me, and so I waited and prayed. I didn’t want to settle for the second best. I knew that if I prayed and trusted the Lord, He would bring the right person into my life.  My recommendation for everyone that has the desire to get romantically involved and find the right person, is to be patient and trust that the Lord will bring you together. This sounds complicated for most of us, right? It’s not! When a person focuses on becoming that amazing, wonderful, free, fun, and special person, you are doing your part to attract your future partner.  Enjoy your life, your many gifts and talents, use them, serve and love God with all your heart. There is no doubt that if God has someone for you, that He will make it happen. It just requires trust and waiting and becoming the best you can be. This reminds of Psalm 37:4, “Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.” As you get in a relationship, take it slowly. Focus on your friendship and in getting to know each other well. Make sure to continue with the same attitude of love and trust towards God. The Lord will teach you how to listen and hear His voice and will tell you if the person you’re dating is his first choice for you or not. God confirms His will in different ways. One way the Lord speaks to us is through the counsel of people that know us well. Having a peace that surpasses all understanding is another sign that we are in God’s will. We should also look for obvious signs too. Make sure they have a close relationship with the Lord. Not everyone that says is a Christian knows Jesus and is willing to listen and obey the Lord. This will also answer the questions a person has about character and integrity.

  • Talk to your partner about everything.  Ask as many questions as possible.  Talk about the future, your goals, your desires and dreams. Look for areas of compatibility and incompatibility.
  • Meet his or her family and friends. Get to know them well and get to know how they act around family in difficult, as well as good circumstances.
  • Have your parents, trusted family, and friends pray for your boyfriend or girlfriend and the process of getting to know each other better.
  • Ask yourself this question. Do I see myself willing to accept and commit to love this person with all of their flaws? Will they love, respect, and accept me with all my flaws?

These are some of the most important aspects of a Christian relationship, besides learning to forgive, having a humble heart of repentance, and the desire to continually keep on learning about how to love more and be less selfish. Remember, His timing is unknown to us, but what we know is that God gives good gifts to his children. James 1:17 states, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”