Honoring God with Your Relationship

Photo by Sweet Ice Cream Photography

Photo by Sweet Ice Cream Photography

McKenna met her sweetheart, Steven, when she was in high school. She instantly liked him but wasn’t sure if the feeling was mutual. 

Ten years passed before both of them signed up for the same mission trip to India. Apparently, the trip went well because Steven asked McKenna out a few months later, and they hit it off. Although this wasn’t McKenna’s first date, Steven was her first boyfriend. 

McKenna is a very patient woman. She was willing to go slowly with Steven—not because she was frightened or trying to follow the “rules” but because she wanted to have a relationship with him that honored God in every way possible. That was her desire. 

And she won. Two years ago, Leon and I attended McKenna and Steven’s wedding and loved it. She is like a daughter to us, and it was so special to see the blessed outcome of her desire to honor God. 

Here are a few thoughts on how we can honor God while dating. 

1. Choose Trust

All the plans God has for you are good (Jeremiah 29:11), and you can trust Him to work in your life. Even in times of pain, heartache, and waiting, you can rest assured that He is busy turning bad things into good things (Romans 8:28).

Spend time with God on a regular basis, reading His Word and listening to His voice. Take His hand, and talk to Him about your desire to marry. Make Him a part of this desire, and don’t listen to fear.

If in your quiet times you feel like He tells you something about your future spouse or marriage, write it down. 

2. Start Off with Friendship

When you meet someone you’re interested in, try to view them as your friend and not as the answer to your heart’s desire. Even if you really like this person and want to start dating right away, thinking of them as a good friend removes any pressure and allows you to see the person more clearly. 

In Christian circles, there is often an unsubtle pressure to hurry up and get married, but moving quickly doesn’t always work well. It is better to take a breather and find your peace before stepping into a commitment with someone. 

3. Be Wise

As you get to know this person better, review your boundaries and practice wisdom. For instance, it’s not a good idea to spend the whole weekend with someone in a love bubble, staying up until late hours. While this can be romantic and thrilling, you’re setting yourself up to feel overwhelmed and vulnerable, and you also could find yourself in a sexual situation.

End the date at a reasonable time and give it a few days before your next outing. This will allow your heart and mind to process your feelings and give you clarity about how to proceed at a healthy rate. 

4. Have Fun

Honoring God with your relationship isn’t about following a set of religious rules. It’s a heart attitude that desires to worship God in all things, even your dating life.

Butterflies aren’t just for teenagers. They are for all singles who are hoping to have a successful dating relationship that one day results in marriage. Have fun as you get to know this person and don’t be afraid—good things are coming to you.


For more information on sex, marriage, and finding the person who is right for you, get a copy of Becoming the One by Salomé Roat. Click here to learn more.