Faith Over Fear: Celebrating 36 Years of Marriage
Fear is one of the greatest obstacles to finding the right person, getting married, and maintaining a healthy relationship with them. Fear pushes us to focus on what might go wrong instead of trusting God with the good thing He is presenting to us.
Fear shouts, “This might be wrong!” But faith says, “I trust the Lord to lead me.”
If fear is keeping you from dating, pursuing a relationship, getting engaged, or stepping into marriage, we encourage you to bring those fears before the Lord. This month at Becoming the One, we’re talking about encountering God’s love, and that is what all of us need when we’re dealing with fear in relationships.
God’s love doesn’t leave us trapped in anxiety, hesitation, or insecurity.
His love heals.
His presence restores.
His wisdom brings clarity.
His perfect love casts out fear.
It’s true that no marriage is perfect. Every relationship requires effort, grace, and commitment. There will always be challenges to overcome.
And yet, when God is at the center of your marriage, fear no longer has the final word. Faith does.
Going to God for Dating Help
For me (Salomé), I had to work through fear before Leon and I were officially dating. He was from another country and spoke a different language. We didn’t even live on the same continent. I thought he was a very cute gringuito, but I was scared to get into a relationship with him before I knew he was my husband. That’s a radical way to approach dating, but I had been praying to date only my husband. How did I know this man was my husband? What if we saw each other for the first time in a year and a half, and I didn’t feel anything for him?
One day I became desperate and prayed, “Please give me a special kind of love for Leon—but only if he’s the one I should marry.”
And that’s what happened. Over the next few days, God revealed my heart to me, and I realized I loved Leon and wanted to be with him. This week we celebrate our thirty-sixth wedding anniversary.
Don’t allow fear to direct your dating life. Go to the Lord and ask for His help.
God Is Greater Than Every Challenge
Every person deals with fear in some form or another. Some are just more obvious about it than others. Even those who seem fearless still have to wrestle with choices, concerns, and what-if questions.
The solution is not pretending that challenges don’t exist. It is trusting that God is greater than every challenge. As we grow in our understanding of His love, fear loses its power, and we gain the confidence to walk forward in obedience and faith.
I (Leon) think the biggest fear in relationships is, “Will this person eventually reject me like I’ve been rejected before?” There is a tendency to think every relationship will end the same way. Some people fear that when the going gets tough, the other person will leave the relationship and want a divorce. The way God dealt with that fear in my life was by giving me a woman I knew would always keep our marital covenant because of her faith in Him.
Even if we have been rejected dozens of times, God in His great mercy never rejects us. He always loves us, no matter what. That’s where grace comes in. He knows what we need and will help us.
If you’re single and thinking about moving forward with someone, always ask God first. Follow His leading, and love Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and spirit. As you do these things, He will bring the right person to you.
To married couples, I would say something similar—never give up. God can always change anyone’s heart in any circumstance. Even if you’re having a problem in your marriage that seems unsolvable, He can do a miracle.
God’s Beautiful Design for His Kids
If you have experienced disappointment, heartbreak, or fear, Jesus is able to make all things new. Through His sacrifice and resurrection power, He heals wounded hearts, restores hope, and gives strength for the journey ahead.
God is not limited by your past. He can remove fear, bring healing, and lead you into the future He has prepared for you.
Marriage is God’s idea. It is His beautiful design for His children, His sacred covenant, and one of the clearest expressions of faithful love on the earth.
Every time I (Salomé) reflect on our marriage, I am reminded that God has been the foundation, center, and sustaining force of our covenant. He created marriage to be pure, life-giving, and deeply meaningful. He is restoring marriages, strengthening families, and raising up generations who understand the power of covenant love—love that casts out all fear.
Beloved child of God, may you encounter His love in such a way that all fear of dating or marriage vanishes. May you discover that with Him, all things really are possible, and may you experience the joy, faithfulness, and beauty of a marriage centered on Christ.
As Leon and I celebrate 36 years together, we are overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank You, Jesus, for the husband You chose for me, for the children You entrusted to us, and for the privilege of serving You together. Thank You for every lesson, every victory, every challenge, and every blessing along the way. Your Word has always been true, and Your promises have never failed us.
And finally, happy thirty-sixth anniversary, my love! The journey has been beautiful, and by God’s grace, the best is still ahead.
Your heavenly Father loves you more than you realize! For more about His amazing, unending love, check out Becoming the One by Salomé Roat. The book is also available in Spanish.