Practical Steps to Make Yourself Ready for Marriage
If we aren’t prepared for it, marriage can be a real shock on the system.
Many of us have no idea what it’s like to share space with another person, sleep next to them, see them first thing in the morning even before they’ve put on makeup or brushed their teeth. We don’t know how to talk about difficult topics, financial concerns, hopes, dreams—we don’t know what marriage is really like.
Here are four ways you can prepare for marriage and strengthen your future commitment to the spouse you may or may not know right now. Even if you’re single, you can practice these things and turn them into a lifestyle:
Develop a personal prayer life and spend time in honest reflection, asking God to show you how to be the person He wants you to be. If you’re dating someone, start praying together on a regular basis.
If you can learn to pray before your marriage—both by yourself in your quiet time as well as with your significant other—this healthy, loving habit will continue through your married life.
2. Let Your Words and Behavior Reflect Your Commitment
If you’re in a relationship, constantly tell your significant other you are committed to them. Make yourself available when the other person wants to talk, and be a good listener. Spend time alone with your partner talking about issues that are important to both of you. Try to find solutions to pressing concerns.
Learn to actively listen. This means listening in such a way that the speaker feels heard. Communicate effectively and have a plan to resolve conflicts.
3. Get Others Involved
Surround yourself with supportive individuals who share your values and want to see you succeed. Have accountability partners. If you’re dating someone, get both sets of parents involved. Ask them for prayer and counsel.
As a side note, seeking the parents’ blessing is a way of honoring them and making them part of one of the most important decisions of your life. Many people don’t want their parents to be involved, but I fully believe that if you choose to seek their blessing, you will be blessed even more.
4. Figure Out What You Want
Someday when you meet the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, what do you want that life to look like? What do you not want? Start thinking now about important topics like spending, saving, debt, children, job security, etc.
Where do you want to live? What are the important household chores and who will do them? How and where do you want to spend the major holidays? Take time to consider these questions, and if you’re dating someone, go over them together.
By tackling these questions in advance, you will build a foundation to work from as you move toward marriage and mingling your life with another person’s.