Why Community Is a Gift
Photo by Belle Co
A few weeks ago, Leon and I attended the wedding of our good friends Karissa and Caleb. Dr. Ed Silvoso officiated, and during the ceremony, he talked about a key to building a strong relationship that lasts a lifetime.
He asked us, the audience, to pledge to Karissa and Caleb that we would pray for them and be there for them, so they could continue growing and have a great marriage.
That’s what every marriage needs—a loving community that will support, encourage, and pray for the couple through thick and thin.
Leon and I have been married for thirty years, and with great faithfulness, the Lord has put in our lives people who have been His arms of protection through their prayers, their time, and their love. They have encouraged us when we’ve gotten a little “stuck” and needed an outside perspective. Different people have loved on us and prayed for us, and every day we get to experience in tangible ways the results of their prayers and affection for us.
Because we’ve seen the value of prayer, prayer is a foundation for us here at BTO and a vital way we minister to married couples and singles. As a ministry team, we pray for marriages, future marriages, and whatever else the Lord puts on our hearts each week. Praying for others’ relationships is part of our joy and passion, and we’re delighted to do it.
These days especially, we should never dismiss the idea of praying for someone’s marriage.
Our prayers carry incredible weight in the spiritual realm—more than we expect. Our prayers matter to the beautiful heart of our Father, who loves us and deeply cares about what happens to us. By taking even just a few seconds to pray for someone else, we increase the possibility for healing, hope, restoration, and desperately needed peace in that person’s life and relationship.
E. M. Bounds (1835–1913) knew the truth about prayer at a deep level. Consider how the following quotes apply to praying about someone’s marriage:
The prayers of God’s saints are the capital stock in heaven by which Christ carries on His great work upon earth.
Prayer is the greatest of all forces, because it honours God and brings Him into active aid.
We can do nothing without prayer.
Prayer can help change broken marriages into healthy ones. Even if we don’t “feel” powerful when we’re praying for someone, if we’re speaking words that line up with the beautiful will of God, which is always good (Rom. 12:2), things shift and move, and we can expect to see abundant life in one way or another.
The biblical law of sowing and reaping applies to marriage as well.
As you plant “seeds” of prayer today for someone else, you can expect to reap the blessing of those prayers in your own life one day. “For what you plant will always be the very thing you harvest” (Gal. 6:7 TPT).
Practice praying for someone else’s relationship today.
Prayer is a relationship-altering, nation-changing activity. I encourage you to take a step of faith in this area—and see what happens.
Every Spirit-led prayer uttered on someone else’s behalf acts as a healing balm to old wounds, aching places, points of despair and hopelessness, etc. I can’t promise you that every broken or hurting relationship you pray for will be fixed, because more is involved than just the prayers you’re praying. For instance, people have free will and get to make their own choices.
But like E. M. Bounds wrote, prayer honors God and invites Him into the situation to help. That’s a big deal!
Think about your friends who are in relationships right now. Who could you pray for? Does anyone stand out to you? Pay attention to the gentle, internal “tugging” toward one person or another, because that quiet pull might be the Holy Spirit asking you to pray for them.
Or has God put a specific married couple on your heart? Begin to pray for them. Ask Him what you should pray for, and see what He says.
Find your community who will support and pray for you.
Are you married? Getting to know someone? Following God’s leading to meet the person He’s set aside for you?
Find your community—the people who will help you and support you in your relationship. Consider the following ideas:
Who is already showing their support for you?
Who treasures you as a person?
Who would be willing to pray for you and your marriage/current relationship/meeting the right person?
If you can’t think of anyone who would pray for you, ask God to bring a prayer warrior into your life. Expect Him to answer this prayer.
If you want to have a good marriage, don’t isolate when problems come. Instead, reach out and ask for help. God will deliver His precious angels in human shape—your trusted friends. You can be someone else’s support through love and prayer, and they can be the same for you.
We are just about to start our spring BTO groups!
One of our biggest priorities in these groups is to create a community of love and support where, among other key things, we pray for each other to become more like Jesus, which is a vital part of every marriage.
If you’re interested in attending, register on our website.
Interested in reading more about dating, relationships, and your walk with God? Here are a few articles on related topics:
For more information on sex, marriage, and finding the person who is right for you, get a copy of Becoming the One by Salomé Roat. Click here to learn more. The book is also available in Spanish.